Bittersweet world

2012-01-25T20:01:00.000+08:00

oh dear shot myself in the foot today. missing tutorial. gosh. now im down the bell curve

2012-01-17T22:44:00.000+08:00

so super irratiting.

2012-01-07T19:43:00.001+08:00

i realised i started 2011 sick (chicken pox no less 2 weeks MC), and ended 2011 sick, and started 2012 sick. maybe its the time of the year ah. haha.

2012-01-06T21:36:00.001+08:00

ahh i got outbidded for korean. dang.

2012-01-05T23:06:00.002+08:00

tis good to think back of the past year and write down golden memories before they fade into the darkness and deepest parts of my mind.

Highlights:
ORD LOH
Dobrogosz does Dobrogosz
Poland Trip with SYC
yoKOso! (one day before orientation camp)
Enrollment into NUS
SNSD CONCERT :D:D:D:D:D:D
Sunny smiling at me during SNSD concert XDXD
18 Dec presentation of Go Tell it On the Mountain
Christmas, my 21 bdae

started well, ended well (especially 9 dec! SNSD :D:D). Can safely say that it has been a good year, with some trying moments but God has led me through safe and secure. All praise and glory be to him. Hope that this year will see more blessings and comforts, as his presence will be more real. (and hopefully SNSD will come again! :D)

2011-12-10T01:22:00.003+08:00

SNSD IS DAMN GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDD

WATCHED THEIR CONCERT JUST NOW SUPERRRRR HIGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH

SUNNY SMILED AT ME!!!1 :D:D:D:D:D GOTTA THANK SHI EN FOR HIS SUNNY BUNNY BOARD!!!!

AND HYOYEON IS SO FRIENDLY SHE SMILED AT ME 3 TIMES!!!!!!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH AND YOONA AND SOOYOUNG WAS SO HOOOOOOOOOOTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

2011-10-23T23:20:00.002+08:00

Today is a crap day and im feeling super depressed coz man u just got...run...over...by...city. they need to buck up, coz hello back to reality we arent as good as they keep saying they are. closing in on barca my foot

AND im stuck with this realli huge decision. feeling very lost and no direction. hopefully when i look back at this post 10 years later i will say to myself i have made the right choice.

2011-06-04T17:04:00.001+08:00

surprisingly i have problems sleeping at night after i've come back from poland. hope it doesnt last for too long.

I have a loud noise in my ear.

2011-01-25T13:42:00.001+08:00

its just plain dumb

2011-01-19T20:30:00.001+08:00

its been a long time since i posted links. here's a good one - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p5xB2WZ9iyg

2011-01-04T19:08:00.001+08:00

blwehhhhhwehwhehwhehhshwhwehwh

IM HOT

2010-12-11T00:43:00.003+08:00

well today was a pretty fine day, and since im in a different state of mind it would be rather interesting to capture my thoughts now for my future reference.

well first of all i must say that as ORD is coming, and ppl start thinking of the next stage in life...it is just so blur. of course no one can predict the future, but currently the status of having an unconfirmed uni does not sit comfortably with me. hopefully the ucas replies come soon. but i guess all things work out well...

then again going with the flow of life and truly seeking out a defined purpose is quite different, and i seem to be going about the former. Not that i mind now but 40 years down the road, are things going to be different? i also watched iryuu recently, all the medical stuff in it kinda scares me. it seems so overwhelming, saving a life needs so much knowledge, so many procedures sometimes it makes u wonder if its all necessary. after all 1000 years ago there was no such thing as operating theaters or medical wards or even panadol. but the human race is still here. after all the best cure is still rest, laughter, your properly functioning white blood cells, and God. Those who have all 4, are blessed but oft overlook what they have. easy to say now hah. i wonder

2010-11-29T22:14:00.002+08:00

somehow on certain decisions i am not consulted and everything is expected to work out in your own ideal fantastical way and when i do things myself it is always wrong. quite the bull in my opinion my since when did u care about that. you place your fantasies over my reality and bit by bit the 2 worlds are colliding and the results are getting more and more apparent.

so instead of those weird ideas why not send me for anger management sessions? coz right now what i want most of all is just to get out of this place and put as many miles as possible between us. and STOP following me for goodness the more u refuse to let go now the more i will leave when the time comes.

2010-11-21T19:47:00.001+08:00

DAMINT. STUPID.

2010-11-04T21:16:00.000+08:00

Another one of the long time office ppl just left, so the landscape of the place has changed pretty dramatically since i first came in. Its quite interesting to think that you're one of the most senior around in terms of time in the dept, but hey thats life, and im also at the bottom of the corporate food chain so yeah.

Some ppl have this airs about them but what to do. Have to live and learn...and they already kinda made it so i guess it worked out for them. the ideas that are churned out are a bit...extreme to say the least.

so the crunch time is so coming, to aussie or take a risk to wait for UK to reply me. kinda a difficult decision to make, im just hoping that UCAS will reply soon...

2010-10-27T21:30:00.000+08:00

i wonder if i could get an alternate accommodation for a week. any offers?

i wonder who can i board with.

2010-10-20T20:32:00.002+08:00

some ppl just have a lack of understanding that they impose on others. unfortunately the lack of understanding seems to be proportionate to their stubbornness and how thick the skull is. then is then and now is now i have no interest in leading a no-life 2 years. a rather simplistic view of things and ur forcing of an ideal situation is very very very irritating. to then associate unrelated stuff into the equation makes it all the more stupid. perhaps when the day comes that u realise why my response is as such then you might deal with it differently but i seriously doubt that it would happen within my lifetime.

anyway today is the 100th day to ORD. quite a significant milestone to come up here and broadcast to anyone who bothers to come and read this sorely neglected site. i seriously cannot stand army. some people say they realise army is better than they thought since they were more free than compared to sch (since they just entered uni). I cannot say for sure since i have not taken that step yet but what i do know is that my IB days were definately not as free as army but i prefer IB like x10000000 more than what im going through now. its not the job scope its just the environment some (mostly one) person that makes it rather sian. the nature of the job also is quite wth but then again thats why we NSFs are there...to do the brainless work (that one day officers have to do when the NSF cuts take full effect). I cant imagine that day coming hehehehe.

the waiting and anticipation in itself is quite the killer, but i cannot say that im fully looking forward to the results coming back. if i get it it would definately be a good thing but after the UQ experience i realli do not want to expect to much. in fact the UQ experience was just horrible what kinda reception did i get to the news man. normally other ppl would be AT LEAST happy or satisfied but wth man i shouldnt have even done that. That everyone in my gen says that they're quite impressed that i got UQ and everyone in that gen says that i've gotten the equivalent of getting gravel out of the mine just shows a gap of ignorance that has taken place in my circle of acquaintances. Unfortunately.........its the wrong group that has the final say.

So it has come to the sad stage where i visit this thrash airing avenue again. i must say that the very low rate of activity here corresponds to the lack of stimulus in my life (except syc of coz. love them). then again frustrations pop up that i only can tell my other inner half, the wall that i sleep next to and this website made of virtual memory and pixels. maybe one day i would read all this again and declare how imature i was, how wrong i was and i hope that would be how things turn out. but then again no one can predict anything, and my posts have an eerie consistency in their content. at least the frequency is decreasing

i still havent let go of that idea that came to me earlier this year. the will and necessity to execute it has become less strong over the past few months but they still exist. i hope i would make the right decision though as it would mean that i may have to numb myself and slay half of me to carry it through. but as things are going i may end up as good as dead in my current place.

100...

2010-10-17T21:04:00.001+08:00

DAMMIT ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !@#$^&**_(_Q**#$*&*@#&$*@#&$(&@#($&@(#*$&@#(*)$&($%^*&^*%!#&%$&%$&*^)#%^&%(^*@#^!@&#)!&*@$)*@&#(*%&(@$^%@$^*@#&%(Y*(EYWEYUISDHFJKSDN F

2010-09-27T20:58:00.002+08:00

DSTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGG
GGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

2010-09-14T17:54:00.002+08:00

up up and away!

this will be the debut overseas competition, so exciting! (msia doesnt count).

hopefully all goes well. go with an open mind, see the world and other choirs. the other choirs sound so pro...so exciting.

oioiooooiiiioooiiiii

2010-09-06T22:22:00.001+08:00

beautiful...absolutely beautiful

it could have been better, but it could have been worse. i guess just have to look forward to the next bigger leap...the apex of what i've done so far.

what a pity though, a character missed...not getting to know better.

2010-07-19T22:08:00.000+08:00

hello world

2010-04-19T22:52:00.000+08:00

off to the land of the rising sun! so exciting this hol feels more special than normal for sun reason. It also promises an exciting end! ahahahahaha maybe its the feel of liberation for one week that gives it such a big trill. yayayayay!

i hope can get some collectibles there :D

2010-04-06T10:15:00.000+08:00

for some reason i want to eat really good pork ribs :D

2010-03-25T08:22:00.002+08:00

some times the days are dark,,,and there are some times when u wonder if day exists at all...

at this rate it'll be a bad sat...gotta take some drastic measures and hope all works out.

some ppl are real idiots.

2010-02-28T22:11:00.003+08:00

why is it always my fault when things arent going according to your ideal? why is it always my transgression when things do not seem smooth. why is it that i always have to measure up to your moral standings when they are just man's laws. If you were so perfect maybe the white walls wouldnt remind me so much of bernada alba, and the place would not seem cold becoz the wind is blowing strongly.

on a seperate note...got to see BEG ystd :D
zomg theyr'e good...love them XD just wish i could get a photo with them and their autograph :D:D:D

and the experience further enforces my view that clubbing is an ultra waste of time and money

2010-02-26T23:47:00.003+08:00

your ignorance and stereotypes coupled with wooden stupidity and unfounded confidence aint a very impressive mix. if your conjectures were half as accurate as they really are than perhaps it would leave you with the tiniest shred of dignity. unfortunately this is not the case, and so while i have to bear with you for now, there would come a time when the situation would be very different.

perhaps the love of face would be it. but after everything, we will see who you have pushed away for others.

2010-01-24T22:25:00.002+08:00

what im writing is not new nor is it deep, but to me its so awesome i have to record it lest i forget

i was pondering this verse:
"But I say to you in truth, there were many widows in Israel in the days of Elijah, when the sky was shut up for three years and six months, when a great famine came over all the land; and yet Elijah was sent to none of them, but only to Zarephath, in the land of Sidon, to a woman who was a widow. And there were many lepers in Israel in the time of Elisha the prophet, and none of them was cleansed, but only Naaman the Syrian"
Luke 4:26-27

and i thought, yeah, thats true. Though much is made out of how Jesus did many feats and miracles and acts of mercy, he did not go throughout the length and breadth of the country to cure as many ppl as possible. After thinking it somehow it was obvious that Jesus's main mission was to be the light of the world, to show the way to salvation in darkness, out of sin. It was something i always knew, but never realli appreciated.

lesson 1:
Spiritual well being far outweights physical well being. Do not lose sight of the true objective for smaller goals.

Then it struck me

lesson 2:
Jesus in his capacity as man was unable to cure and heal all the sick and disabled people in Israel. Likewise we as human beings cannot hope to achieve everything by ourselves. Just as he chose the 12 disciples to continue his work, we also must realise that there are others around us to share the burden of making Christ known to the world and doing his work

lesson 3:
However, Jesus in his capacity as God, sacrificed himself on the cross to save the whole world. This shows that through God, man is able to do all things and nothing in possible. The logically impossible synthesis of man and deity in Jesus is the ultimate example that human beings can accomplish great things when we are empowered by the grace and might of the Father above. Of course none of us are as perfect or great as Jesus was, but we can take encouragement of the fact that when God works through his body of believers, great things are waiting to happen.

then i thought to myself. Since Christ main's purpose in coming down to earth was to sacrifice himself on the cross, why didnt he do that from the start? He did go around for 3 years before doing the ultimate act of love?

lesson 4:
"Even so faith, if it has no works, is dead, being by itself" James 2:17
A very famous and controversial verse, used by some deviants to support some of their ways of thinking. However, this verse describes the life of Jesus well when he dwelled on Earth. He was not obliged to cure the blind, nor cast out demons, but still he was moved by compassion or impressed by the faith of certain individuals, and that prompted him to act. What kind of ministry would he have left if he just died without going around teaching and explaining? He has left behind an unparalleled legacy of love, grace and mercy that we are all supposed to follow, all supposed to strive for. As we walk the path of Christ, we should overflow with love. God is so big, he fills the universe. So when we fit God into our hearts, he should show out through us, fill us and overflow.

So amazing. So divine. Yet so simple. And profound. Its so much common sense, yet it feels like im being taught so much. Truly these living words are the words that make wise the foolish, and make dumb the wise.

For we are poor, not materially, but spiritually. But we are only poor if we realise so. If we acknowledge our spiritual poverty and submit, there will be so much richness to come.

Truly, "blessed are the poor IN SPIRIT, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven" - Matthew 5:3

"Amen. Come, Lord Jesus. The grace of the LORD Jesus Christ be with us all" Revelations 22

2010-01-23T22:50:00.000+08:00

the new songs are awesome

so rich in harmony.

i think i lvled up today. Its been so awesome so far

2010-01-11T18:51:00.002+08:00

by all accounts this has been the worse flu that i got in recent memory. good and bad in some ways but a timely reminder that the human body can only do so much and go so far. the funny thing is that i got it during this time in NS, where i dun realli push myself physically compared to school. whatever the case, it made me take my 2nd MC in the space of a month, which is a first.

feeling the body breaking down and grinding to a inelegant stop makes one wonder how did the human race feeble as we are come to dominate this planet. it is such grace and wonder that we are blessed with so much when we come with so little, both physically, spiritually and morally as well. Just as our bodies find difficulty coping with the common cold, so does the planet earth have difficulty trying to accommodate our atrocious habits of polluting and defiling it. We are the virus that is slowly spreading toxins, poisons killing off our host.

recently the jnrs got back their IB results. It was ownage as expected, and better than us. Such is the nature of life, 10 years down the road no one would rmb that their year had pretty bad SYF results, or their sports were not as up to par as us, but they would be remembered as the batch that beat the 2nd and 1st batches (if we even get remembered at all). Not that im bitter, but just making an observation. such selective memory by us human beings is all just so convenient for us. As i rmb my TOK presentation "Justice is decided by the victor" or along those lines, that the one left standing is the one that defines what is right or wrong. That is so fickle. This day and age would embrace a different set of values for what is to come 10, 100 years later, and the trend is that everything is going to get more liberal, more humanistic, more carnal and self gratifying. Only one thing has stood constant, has been there watching thru all time, God. When the end of all things come, Christ will stand the ultimate victor, and he will judge the everything like the true ruler he was when time was just a concept, when man was just a breath.

Will we be ready?

2010-01-04T21:35:00.000+08:00

happy new year to everyone.

one year down one more to go.

HAI

2009-12-14T09:56:00.001+08:00

the performance was...awesome.

for those who came thank you and hoped u enjoyed it.

for those who didnt come again nxt yr! it will be good i promise.

ah the sweet music...

2009-12-07T00:36:00.003+08:00

normally i would like to come to blog under better moods but oh wells

so the world revolves around your mood and so everything must be ur picture perfect cookie cutter sweet ideal that nothing else can fit in. so you are the only good one and everyone falls short of your ideal expectations that verge on the edge of being unreasonable.

wake up

the world has aged and Christ is coming back one day closer at a time. If you remain stuck in your past glories and try to put up that front one day you might find that no one will stick by you when the leash is cut forcibly.

on a brighter note.

the songs that are being sung for the concert are so beautiful! they are so rich in meaning, metaphor harmony melody intricate composing styles wow. its a whole new dimension of music that im just beginning to step into and i must say it is addictive. i can finally shake off my frustrations from the previous years and just plunge into this new experience. sure i realise that i am far short of what i need to be...but that is for once a good thing, to step out of my comfort zone.

compared to singaporean 'folk songs', what chan mali chan? di tanjong katong? nope plaukia, sapnu, meelespea are all so rich in meaning and history, all so high level of music. no wonder singapore has a dearth in cultural substance. we are just so far behind.

just so far behind...

2009-11-06T21:14:00.002+08:00

thought of the day 1: 99% of chio girls my age have a bf

thought of the day 2: 99.5% of girls with virtuous character also have a bf

thought of the day 3: im gonna stick in the nv-will-get-a-gf club permanantly

thought of the day 4: gosh there are so many more impt things in life why am i thinking of this now

2009-10-19T10:04:00.002+08:00

i just read 3 blogs, with totally contrasting contents

the angsty frustrated angry blog
the whut?????? blog
the realli mature blog that impresses me greatly

its interesting to see how the same educational institute produces so many different kinds of people.

that said, i realise that some people have learnt to grow up, some are struggling to grow up, while others havent grown up at all.

an alarming observation for those who fall under the 3rd category. an even more alarming situation for those who do not realise that they are stuck.

i wonder

2009-10-12T07:48:00.001+08:00

the internet connection at work is damn lousy

im hungry...and tired

i have this work inertia. this is bad. dead by thurs.

2009-10-05T08:57:00.002+08:00

there are some times when you feel as if all the colour in the world around you fades and everything becomes a pall shade of black and white, where life distills itself into a bleak melancholic rythmn that beats incessantly without a blinking an eyelid. where destiny never cries for you but stares with eyes that bore through the human spirit and cuts down to the deepest depths of a human soul, revealing...nothing.

maybe its the october air, maybe its the stony stare
but i know im walking down the road of despair.
little by little fading away, hastening towards the end of days
yet, where my body will lay
please, nothing you will see.

currently bones are the drumsticks, skulls are the drums. the scythe my staff and the mask my identity. u beat the rythmn, i live the life. but at the end, all there is but strife. people rise, only to fall. such is the way of it all.

the ring of doom, sounds out. i stop and stare, and realise that all is within. doom comes from one, and life comes from the same. but maybe. maybe. salvation comes from you.

2009-09-28T10:13:00.002+08:00

i read some stomp articles today coz matt told me abt some NJC hoo haa that resurrected itself after 2 years.

i was appalled by ris low's english, but i must say that after reading thru the comments on stomp she is quite representitive of the singaporean population. the standard of speech there is atrocious. and coming from me...

im quite amazed at how some sch lessons are carried out. thankfully we never had that kind of stuff in sch. role playing was common (and mighty fun i will add) but flaming another sch and making death threats at live people were never carried out. but oh wellz...thats what makes some schs better than others i guess.

hopefully i dun go boomz in the street haha

2009-09-23T08:01:00.000+08:00

i've been rather impressed by how well some people can think.

me on the other hand, am hungry now and cant think past lunch

2009-09-21T21:35:00.002+08:00

somehow i feel this sense of total dread as i return to work tmwr. its worse than anything i've ever felt, even in my sch days. i wonder what is it that makes me so dislike my army work. in sch, i've woken up looking forward to another day, or maybe thinking of ponning sch at times, but i've nv realli felt this...sianess so strongly. its irritating coz its definitely affecting my work performance. how i wish ORD would be soon.

D2 is fun...but i hope that the game im playing now isnt screwed up.

lock in: Oct 10.

2009-09-08T20:37:00.000+08:00

i still feel quite tired, for some unknown reason. Sch hours regularly ran longer than army hours, and im doing so much less than when i was in sch. so why do i feel so tired?

in other thoughts, prelims are coming round for the j2s and year 6s. all the best. everything comes round...and everything ends. but its proven to be done and possible, so pls take encouragement from that.

my...future...looks more blury than ever

2009-09-03T20:39:00.000+08:00

im tired these few days. that in turn has been causing me to be on a permanant sort of bad mood.

im quite worried for aus and ucas apps. i've not been doing much to get them, and tho i noe that it would be nice to go overseas, i dun realli like giving up so much that i've staked here (choir, frens, church). but then again i cant realli think of what i can do in NUS since i got rejected by med alrdy...i cant try again so that kinda forces my hand since i also rejected pharm.

sometimes, its good to be less rich, and to be more simple.

2009-08-24T22:20:00.000+08:00

ah! how to do that ringing tone, the one where u resonate the sound in your head???? been trying until the family members are getting seriously pissed off and irritated. gosh i need a manual haha. hopefully im on the way.

2009-08-20T20:20:00.000+08:00

nothing shakes a man like a birth, and a death. the ultimate knowledge that one never controls his destiny, no matter what other ppl say.

and death, in all its tragedy, is the greatest thing that can happen to one in Christ, one who is washed cleaned of all transgressions. As my heart sorrows, it rejoices. As my mind despairs, it hopes. As my body weakens, it is lifted. Death, has thrown its full might, and in the process has finally relinquished all its power. A great paradox one might say, and it is great in many a ways. for never has such complete victory been concealed in such apparent biggest of defeats. and yet, many ppl do fall, nv to rise again.

A good man forever departs
What sorrow doth filleth my heart
The waning of a flame of life
A cruel turn of fate's own dice

yet sparkling forth into eternal bright
one can ne'er comprehend its glowing light
for when one knows the truth once gave
he can say in Christ, all is saved

2009-08-18T21:54:00.000+08:00

only 2 kinds of ppl can piss me of real bad

work collegues, and family.

rite now its both

2009-08-18T07:55:00.002+08:00

in my youtube surfs i've seen quite a number of great pianists in action, both dead and alive now. kissin, maria argerich, arrau, horowitz, berezovsky, bennett, yundi li...etc. cant rmb all now. but i think now there's this up and coming pianist, super good - wang yuja. her clips on youtube are all nothing short of extraordinary, with unimaginable technique (for me) at the highest level coupled with musical maturity and depth that is so rare to be found in such a perfect combination as hers. If you are interested in good music, one should go listen.

super tired now. but nvm good music lifts the soul

2009-08-15T11:27:00.000+08:00

yesterday's concert, 14th Aug Vox Masala II.

i can't realli say the choir changed much since 2007. still the same old problems sound wise. Rather worrying is the lack of response to the conductor's guiding on stage.

ALumni was good. i was rather impressed. but then all of them are stronger singers than me haha so i guess its more like their real standard. a little unsteady here and there and of course cannot match the width of the main choir due to numbers, they did a good job of what they had at hand. but the miking was bad. PA realli need to improve more.

2009-08-14T23:43:00.001+08:00

i hate today

2009-08-12T21:46:00.001+08:00

I hate project!

and today was a realli barren day for mousehunt. super irritating.

2009-08-10T16:37:00.000+08:00

lets see

mousehunt is proving to be addictive.

my singing seriously sux

i realise, all my childhood frens have grown up. which is a little bittersweet coz when we were young growing up was all we could think of, yet now that we're here...it seems that when we were young things were so uncomplicated.

2009-07-31T15:37:00.002+08:00

so after a good streak of catching quite a bit of mice (including the rather hard vampire mouse), my radioactive blue has been eaten 5 times with no catch. stupid lycan mouse, so hard to catch.

what i think would be ideal now: Remove me from project clerk scheme AND move saforo up to lvl 4, kick out DRtech would be good.

2009-07-28T10:52:00.002+08:00

im quite tired now. i think its coz of the cold weather last night that froze me out of my slp. and i dun even use aircon.

thinking back on my IB life, the fact that i attained the results that i got is kinda of a small miracle. I tried to think of the subjects in which i could safely say that i aced in my IAs. apart from BIO (thnx to mdm yong's pushing in term 2) i managed to do rather well in that section. but EL...no...although i enjoyed IOC and World Lit, my actual outcome wasnt as good as what i expected it to be. Math, not realli, passable. Chinese doesnt count coz its so freaking low standard. Chem, that one i realli dunno, coz we nv got to see the results. But from what i did in class it cant be realli all that good....

So in short, somehow along the line i managed to pick up enough 7s and 6s to make a decent score. which is rather amazing considering i did my EE in like one nite and morning chiong session, and my tok was realli languishing coz i was so uninterested. quite a miracle. I guess once u look back u can appreciate how much blessings one gets, how much one cannot do and how limited a person truly is.

oh if any of you are wondering why i can blog at this time, im blogging from office. its realli cold here. the air con vent is just above me and its blowing cold air into my hand. soon i wouldnt be able to feel my right hand. yay. its a cold day too. double trouble. things seem to have gotten a little better since my last chiong sua session. so lets see what happens this fri.

I think when i left sch, a part of me never left. its strange, coz i miss my JC and my Pri sch, but somehow i dun realli miss my sec sch. to me it was fun and good and yeah a most pleasant experience, but then it doesnt stick. doesnt stick. pri 6 definately is unforgettable, and IB life was unique, recent and most relevant to me i guess. and after being thrown into army i miss it even more.

i wonder if ppl actually read this haha. but ignorance is bliss. only when u are sure that there isnt anyone around that u can truly bare ur true feelings. of course everyone has maybe a select group of people to share thoughts with. but over such public domain it might not be that wise to expose ur character in such full detail.

I was listening to the Beethoven Symphony 9 last night, the 4th movement i think. it was realli long 32 mins in all. but it was good. Wah when the bassus part came in it was just fantastic. amazing and SSO is playing it in NOV. lets see if i can catch this one, unlike the epic fail when wil and i tried to get Yundi Li tix but it was sold out in like 2 weeks?

haha play piano play piano

2009-07-26T18:58:00.000+08:00

i dun wanna go work tmwr. grr.

anyway it has been cruelly and nicely laid before me that my singing is way below standard. i have been too used to a standard where the 'nirvana' was where everyone could actually decently hit the notes correctly, and since i THINK i can do that quite well, i have never realli worked hard to do anything else.

but noooo. the 3 hours standing itself already is enuf to kill my back. ppl back in sch should try it. it will kill some ppl for sure. now i have to shake off that 'note-hitting' mindset for something so much higher, something that exists on a higher musical level and plain. now i have to listen out closely to other parts, not that i've not been doing that alrdy, but last time was just to check basic chords, if im off tune. the stuff that im learing requires real listening, with complex and rather obscure stuff to me (im lousy). so yeah. woah its hard its hard and its gonna make me a better choral singer. yeah

2009-07-25T23:14:00.000+08:00

so this wk was a total bomb out.

this 2 years of my life will be the longest ever. IB passed so fast. It was so fun and i learnt so much. But this is a total crap experience.

dun worry feelings are mutual.

1 person handling 40 something ppl (minimum estimate). is ok. 1 person handling these ppl and nt allowed to be on site. not ok.

oh well. 2 years. 2 years. im not too sure i'll end up where i started. but im sure that i will end.

2009-07-15T21:09:00.000+08:00

argh.

anyway i cant wait for sat. lets see what happens.

my upperstudy is leaving soon. nooooooooooo...hai yah. sian diao. smart guy, realli gonna die without him xia. saddening.

2009-07-11T23:00:00.002+08:00

there is this good jap restaurant beside the s'pore river, near river valley. its called koba man. The service is good man. so is the food. its good stuff.

well well well. This is the first time where i've been truly and well exposed as a total noob, a realli untalented singer with a LONG Looooooooooooooong way to go before i can truly say that i have some standard. amazing truly amazing.

lets hope the next few years would be a fruitful one. its gonna be a whole new experience, and im gonna enjoy it. im gonna learn and improve, and im gonna build on my noobness so that i cant be noob no more. no thnx. i need to be at least ave there.

all the best benlee

2009-07-05T20:32:00.002+08:00

so michael owen signed for man u. i met with the syc exco including jennifer tham this sat. i actually didnt notice rachel at a bustop and walked pass her and daoed her (im quite pleased). pigs can fly, cows can sing.

owen, man u? just a few years ago that was UNTHINKABLE. but the unthinkable has happened. Oh well if man u do better without ronaldo than the 80 mil is a good investment. after all the got AV and owen with a fraction of the cash. Hope AV is as good as they say man. he has big shoes to fill.

tmwr is another week of work. I dun like it, but i have to do it. jia you.

2009-06-29T21:15:00.002+08:00

ok, after my recent love story + viva la vida craze, the next thing thats in for me is andrea bocelli's "melodramma". shiok. so sad, as the name suggests...and so beautiful. there is beauty in sadness, art in despair, for it is when men is at his lowest then the he can fully appreciate the true height of beauty.

nice song.

im somehow survived today. praise the LORD. he answered my prayer for deliverance yestd. now to survive the week.

i heard some interesting discussion between nng and jamir on sun. but i wun talk abt it. too long.

i wanna slp.

2009-06-25T22:37:00.002+08:00

so...

another course has passed. im bored, and im starting to think if im letting myself down after all that has happened so far in army. like i have a list of work to do that never ends, and seems to grow perpetually.

maybe i should work harder. mmaybe i should work alot harder. dunno. but then again its hard to force me to work when i dun want to work...when there's no sense of urgency of fulfillment when the task is done.

im secular

i wonder how forgiving is the real world out there, as i get the impression that where im at now isnt realli the real world. its softer, more comfy and warm than what people always say the world is like, what cold and unforgiving.

then again i think too much. or i dun think at all. i think its both. hmm. i need to work smarter. and idle less.

idle less i think.

2009-06-17T19:38:00.000+08:00

gosh the viva la vida + love story arrangement is so cool. I would post the link but since its so famous alrdy i guess i dun need to. for those who dunno, just go youtube type in viva la vida love story and click the first link. the one with a million over views. you cant miss it. aweeesome.

im tired of waiting for the scores to come out in some form or another, so i would try the impossible, to try figure it out myself. gonna take a looong time (by which the score may have come out alrdy). so gd luck to me.

anyone noes which music program is good?

2009-06-15T20:42:00.002+08:00

gosh. DSTA is nooooooooooot good at all. super super super SUPER inefficient. zomg 2 months on oneeee stuppid ip filtering. I am super slack, but even I dun noe whaaat is going on at DTT. are they sleeping?

And y cant i end the day of work without some complain from saforo that im not around? Gosh firstly the PC monitor is not working, 2ndly there is a lot of arrows raining from the heavens up at lvl 4 that im trying to catch and process. a bit of slack eh?

argh, i feel like burning my leave. not good not good. and my music isnt improving much, only "i got rythmn" is making SOME progress. but not enough.

2009-06-02T22:09:00.002+08:00

sigh...the work that i get at office is not as hard as the arrangements that i have to follow. run up run down run up run down sian diao leh. wtheck lah. sian diao seri-ous-ly. most of hte work comes from upstairs anyway, not downstairs, but nooooooo i have to stay downstairs or they will try to boot me out. troublesome.

interview for scholarship for pharm? something realli unexpected. lets see how this works out.

STUPID wah liao ok lah i dun mind camping downtstairs, its colder and lonelier but the arrows are less. seriously. but i have to admit i enjoy doing the upstairs work more xia. although its aloooot more, i cant seem to drag myself to complete the 2 tasks that downstairs have given me.

wah even more brilliantly i have been tasked to learn com programming!!!! zomg studying after IB wasnt realli the situation that i forcasted myself to be in. and uni notes on VBA and MACRO??? nonononono that was totally out of any equation i had. its like trying to learn a new language (it is technically, trying to learn computer language). zomg i have to dl all these C+ stuff and macro to play around at home? lol i think if i survive this office thinggy i would come out rather changed. seriously.

i rediscovered the sleeping power of powerpoint slides. just stare at them and soon u'll go zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

2009-05-16T18:03:00.002+08:00

yesterday was sso concert "Signature tunes"

the first half was ok lah...didnt help that i needed to go toilet. the debussy piece was pretty intriging, musical art if u would call it. but then sso seemed a bit sian...alright

oh well i came to watch the 2nd half anyway. to watch the pianist to be exact. boris bereovsky. playing rachmaninoff's piano concerto 3. i found him on youtube

www.youtube.com/watch?v=O5raMK4Z9co

playing islamey about a year ago and knew that i had to see him. my sis was rather sceptical abt this pianist that i kept saying was pro. and how wrong was she. by the end she became a fan too. haha

first mvmt wasnt that good...he was still warming up, and the SSO still exuded that sian aura. 2nd and third was just marvelous. when the piece ended the audience just couldnt stop applauding 3 encores and he had to drag the concert master off stage. amazing stuff.

ur should watch him.

2009-05-11T21:23:00.003+08:00

ppl, u all should watch les miserables 10th aniversary concert on youtube. its GOOD.

lets see theres the famous i dreamed a dream

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yt-IBJpEMzA

and let me say this is MUCH MUCH better than susan boyle. move aside, the original is here man.

just gives tingles down the spine man, the feeling when ur shown a great and awesome work of art. when ur breath is taken away and u realise that these people have achieved a level of accomplishment so high that u can only dream of achieving. oooo nice man.

some guy changed my pm on msn. i wonder who, but his/her actions are rather immature in my opinion. haha for someone as cranky as me to say that...

2009-05-09T19:54:00.000+08:00

hmph. well lets see anything interesting so far....

work...nothing much.

at home...nothing much too.

uni apps...no response still.

kk so this makes this post a nothing much post.

2009-04-18T23:03:00.002+08:00

hai hai hai

i dun think my NUS interview went well. oh damnit. and its a one shot thing only, no second tries. hai maybe God wants me to do something else in my life, or maybe he's gonna make it such that even if i get in i have NO way of saying its my own effort, but purely by his grace. see how, what does God have in store. meanwhile its just trust and faith :)

Heroes III is quite fun :) rediscovering this old classic which i used to mug abt haha. yeah thnx to william yeah.

2009-04-13T23:41:00.002+08:00

wah nus application is was realli just one big rush man. dunno whether i can do it well anot, trying to get testimonials done within 2 days, calling ppl, getting documents and typing stuff. whew.

thank you dr ng and uncle seng kee. acceding to my requests to get testimonials at such freaking short notice.
and to ma, pa and zair, for helping me edit, run around submitting docs, helping out with the pictures...
marco, for letting me grill him on what happened for him for the test.
AND GOD. for strength and grace.

well, lets see what happens next man.

2009-04-01T20:46:00.001+08:00

yay. anyone noes how to entertain a group of ppl that are way superior than you, looking for a good time out with minimal sweat, heat, and not cbd area? must be maxium cohesiveness so no movie. hai. and their 20 yrs older than u. some of them.

2009-03-28T13:47:00.000+08:00

hmm...i miss sch life.

2009-03-22T23:12:00.002+08:00

so, i'll be off to my new posting tmwr. im not supposed to reveal sensitive information, so i wun say where i am posted to. (wow, like where im going is such a high security place). anyway, its realli realli normal, so dun imagine much, i just want to avoid some red tape here.

im L9 anyway, and that means fit for sedentary work in bases only. so u can guess what that means. yay.

my office life starts early, so guess its good experience for the working world if i do land an office job. so yeah.

on a side note, i just attended another funeral. death and life are becoming more and more apparent as one gets older. i keep thinking who would be the first among my batch to die, and when will it come. i guess when the time does actually come, it would be a great reminder to us all that indeed life is fallible, and like the lily in the field it withers so fast that no one remembers that it was there at all.

guys, to life.

2009-03-17T23:38:00.002+08:00

this altrustic crap at home is kinda irritating. having a hard time trying to live your own live because it affects others is very frustrating. having a certain time to sleep set because of others is kinda stupid.

and i'll take that crap

coz im me, and what doesnt kill you makes you stronger. sooner or later all this has to end, and then i will smile again, with less falsity and plastic than i normally put in. whatever happens, happnens

homies

2009-03-10T23:35:00.002+08:00

i havent updated in a long time. relatively.

anyway...my BMT is over. OVER. POC ended on mon, but had to stay back an extra day to do some work for the POP parade. but that, was just a small part of the BMT experience.

Field camp, ippt, range (didnt do that), 5BX, ET, all were only made possible by the fanatastic platoon spirit that existed in Mohawk platoon 2. yeah. commanders were good, people were good, what more can u ask for. the field camp was really memorable and crappy tho. would nv want to go thru that again.

my dad said that he lost contact with a lot of his army frens. hopefully in this age of IT, that senario might not be as bad as last time.

Mohawk

2009-03-01T16:52:00.002+08:00

poc in 7 working days time!

mdc auditions were a disaster today. oh wellz. lol my attempts at being lighthearted were a disaster, being interpretated as attitude problem. oh well clerk here i come

book in late today. after field camp actually...i dun realli mind army. its like sch, after a while its fun, and anyway the worse is over. they're just winding up the stuff and getting ready for POC. should get frens contacts fast.

and apply for uni. busy busy period. dun think block leave would be thaaaat free.

2009-02-14T12:31:00.002+08:00

i just read my sis's blog. its so emo.

but then again now is the time to be emo.

i usually type alot. but im lazy now.

army kiks the energy out of u man.

realli.

if u want a detailed explanation of events over the last few days ask me and i'll direct u to her blog.

2009-02-13T12:01:00.002+08:00

well, im back one day early from confinement in limbo. an adventure camp on a beautiful island resort. its a very nice place, the scenery is quite stunning i must admit. its rather relaxing when ur not doing anything, which happens quite often so far. i dun mind going back for another 5 weeks, so we'll see what happens during that time.

i got one day's early leave that i would rather not get. hai hai hai dun want to talk abt here...but lets just say that its rather saddening thing that happened...

erm...everyone's offline, its hard to contact the guys coz they're all in army. so been talking alot to the girls recently, which doesnt make me tooooo comfortable. some guy conversation would be greatly appreciated.

heard frisbee expanded greatly. nicely done guys. will try to come down and visit ur one day. and choir too. and guitar when that teacher finally forgets that i owe them 150 bucks. bah waste of money.

2009-01-27T22:24:00.001+08:00

army tmwr...

and im off to serve the nation. tis a noble job, and honour is supposed to be bestowed on those who do this deed. in the ol' days ppl sent soldiers off with much fanfare and celebrations. well...i'll create my own celebrations

so dudes, im finally joining u guys. see you at the end of it

2009-01-25T00:43:00.002+08:00

i havent posted in ages.

partly coz there's nothing reaallli interesting to post abt.

well lets see..

met up with pri sch frens. played lan with them 3 days in a row. shiok! and the others also glad that they're doing well. a realli nice bunch of ppl. went to see mr tay twice, on mon and fri. ai tong has changed physically (abit), but then as a sch nothing much has changed haha. teachers still shouting, the hall, lining up, canteen blah blah. nostalgic man.

i realised i dun noe alot abt my pri sch frens. yeah. sad rite. trying to make use of this opportunity to noe them better.

army is coming soon. im kinda happy that i can get out of the house for once. heard from frens that the ppl aint too bad. hope that the good sergeants dun run out before my company.

peace guys.

2009-01-05T08:58:00.000+08:00

back from america...

dun feel like talking. tmwr is results...cant wait.

2009-01-01T05:45:00.002+08:00

the last day of the year...at least here in the US. its kinda funny that suddenly 2008 is over, and i'll spend the new year in international airspace in that. over in s'pore the new year has already come rite? so fast...

gotta thank all the well-wishers who remembered my bdae (and facebook) and said a lil hi or something. its the one thing that makes me miss singapore the most...friends. i kinda miss talking to a familiar face that isnt my family.

anyway...almost done. time to go back home.

2008-12-23T08:37:00.002+08:00

at the airport now...gonna leave soon. cant wait for results to come in so i can finally get rid of the nagging feeling that i had for the past 1 month.

posts seem to be getting shorter now...as my life becomes more boring and less emotionally intense. maybe it'll start getting longer in army. hope not, stress isnt good for health aint it.

gotta start linking so many ppl when i come back from hols. hope can find good presents there...after all this may be the last time that i'll be seeing a lot of ppl...

2008-12-22T21:12:00.001+08:00

hmmm. US tmwr. wonder if its gonna be a good trip. hope the group would be good.

2008-12-18T20:18:00.003+08:00

ergh i cant stand it.

my dad has this running nose problem and he keeps sniffing. its SUPER IRRITATING. i dun have a very high affinity for the sniffing sound, and his is particularly IRRITATING. the length, the pitch, ARGHHH. HE DID IT AGAIN! i swear its driving me mad. i dunno how he takes care of himself, he go to slp wake up get sinus. he go out ok come back with sinus. come back ok suddenly get sinus. what the. sucking so much mucus in cant be good rite. can see he sometimes trying not to cough. he's gonna die in the long run. he refuses to blow it out also! zomg daaaaaaaaaammmmmn irritating, coz its stuck up there and not removed he has to keep sniffing OVER AND OVER AGAIN!!!! zomg i cant stand it!

2008-12-16T23:37:00.001+08:00

update update

2008-12-04T22:03:00.002+08:00

some songs from Readers Digest Dec 2008

To the tune of "sleigh ride"

Just hear that cashier jingling,
Ring ting ting-a-ling, ooh,
That will be 16 dollars
for three bananas for you.

Come watch our dollar falling
While friends are bawling, boohoo,
Because its 16 dollars
For five gree olives for you

Diddyap, giddyap, giddyap, they go
Those prices we know,
They're leapin' like htose
many bills we owe.
Going up, going up, going up, it's tons
For hot dogs and buns
We're tryin'; our credit's dying' -
did somebody say bank run?

our cheeks are red from sneezing
Since its freezing in here.
We're bundled up in blankies
And craving hankies and beer.

Let's move into the Taurus
And sing a chorus or two
Because it's 16 dollars
For seven fish sticks for you

2008-11-29T22:06:00.001+08:00

wah after exams soooo busy. didnt expect it. have to cancel appointments and reschedule stuff. haiyah i need a break.

the surprising thing is that i dun realli plan what to do. stuff just falls on me day by day. suddenly theres a frisbee training, out of nowhere pops a class outing, a frens invitation to play soccer, ppl coming from australia without telling. so manny things. haiz.

i wanna rest, play com and music, talk to frens.
yeah thats the life. search for a uni. find some meaning in life

you get the drift?

coz thats how im living life now, drifting along

2008-11-23T19:41:00.002+08:00

whew. exams being over and done with, is a huge load of the mind. so much i wan to say but cant be bothered. haha thats me rite. cant be bothered.

anyway too much rantings cant be good as well. lets keep this short and sweet.

for all those in Ai tong class of 6D, pls pls lets meet up again! haha gd times erm my email is acsi_rulez@hotmail.com (stupid rite)

for those who stay in the area, lets constantly meet up. there are no limits to the amount of prata rite? haha

for anyone else who is bored and wanna say hi, well...haha go ahead!

2008-11-13T20:36:00.002+08:00

wah hahahahaha

bio left

el wasnt the bestest of events but its overrrrrrrrr. i think im one of the few that found paper 1 better than paper 2. but oh wells it was a rather pleasant experience,walking out of the hall thinking that i didnt disappoint myself.

bio bio bio bio survive survive. the end is nearrrrr, the final hurdle and always the tallest, hardest. but after clearing it, the road would be straight and smooth for a few months.

yay

2008-11-09T22:01:00.002+08:00

nxt week would be nightmare week.
9 papers in 4 days is not something to be sneezed at, and hist paper 3 together with chem paper 1 and 2 is probably the worse combination of a single day, rivalling math with hist.

BUT

after that, i have 3 days for pure bio revision, and AFTER that it will be OVER.
YAY

fast rite. im gonna graduate. the day which i could barely envision as a wide-eyed sec 1 has now come. just 4 more times of this cycle of life and i'll reach 72 yrs of age, ready to go join my LORD in heaven. haha time flies, but i'll be looking forward to the end of it.

2008-11-07T21:28:00.001+08:00

exams started today

not a very good start, but oh wells...

nxt week: nightmare week. after that, it will be easier.

hopefully

2008-10-25T19:34:00.002+08:00

28th jan - with all the other Pes Cs. all wells army cant be THAT bad rite. after all we have a few million guys in Singapore that have went thru and survived it. if i go to an overseas uni can tell my foreign frens that i was once a soldier. haha. (dun tell them abt the pes C part).

exams coming soon, i cant wait for them to be over. i think they're worse than army, looking forward to army more than the exams.

was thinking abt who was gonna get the elusive 45 points in our batch, and came up with a list of potential ppl. (note im not very sure with the ppl at the intact side)

shaun ang
alex lee
kevin choy
arjun
yan ming
steven neoh
song yeong
tim lim
evelyn thangaraj
john leo caines
ian lim
daniel joseph lim
(i dun think indra well get it)
well i dun much abt the ppl in .10 as well. and im going to stick out my head further by trying to predict who will get the 45 pts

steven neoh
yan ming
tim lim

thats abt as far as i dare to predict. i would put song in if he is on form for econs, and evelyn but she hasnt never broken the 40 pt mark so well...i dun the others well enuf

2008-10-12T20:52:00.002+08:00

as the last day of sch has come and gone...guess it'll be a good time to reflect on past experiences...

kk, lets start with the classes

1.1 matthew, year 2003
the first class that i entered in ACSI, kinda mix of sportsman and muggers. took higher chinese. seems rather far away now, but the wierdest people were my classmates. wierd in the sense that when i think back now i realise "eh these were my classmates, nv thought much abt that". kinda cool, but 1 year is too short and didnt realli click well with the group in class, so yeah.

2.2 simeon, year 2004
fun class. yeah was good, would have been awesome to have had continue in that class for a few more years. but oh wells we had to split up. the zhi zhuang - wei lai combo was ownage, and it was quite fun. IA was in our class, which gave the class dynamics more colour (literally). good times, realli good times, probably better than year 4 even. possibly the best year of my ACSI life

3.15, 4.15, years 2005 and 2006
fun class, the class that has created the most lasting friendships, partly coz of the longer time spent, and also coz the people there were great. lost Jay in the transition from sec 3 to 4, otherwise no change. teachers great, Ping Loong, Drak and win hon among the more memoriable ones. heartlanders vs aristocrats one of the highlights of the week

5.12 6.12, years 2007 to 2008
the last two years to cap off the acsi experience. took me realliiii long to get along with all the members of the class tho. only could click with a small group at first, and also the non-intact nature of the class meant that it would have been hard to fully socialise, and tend to stick to the same group in all the classes. 2 years is a relatively long time tho, and its safe to say that i love my class after all that we've been through. thnx guys for the IB experience :)

CCAs:
Table-tennis -
yes, i was in table tennis. it was pretty bad, staying back late so many times a week, training and suffering verbal abuse from the coach, and then not gaining any ground on the other schs. only good point was that i got to know some people i otherwise wouldnt have known, jia yi, ronald lai, josh, andre, ying hao.

chess club -
yes, i was in chess club too. the first few years were a blast, attending weds and thurs sessions faithfully, playing transfer chess and other unorthadox forms of the game, and wiping the other schools on the floor during the competitions. good times those days were really good. too bad the state of the club fell apart after mr Kenneth ong left, oh well its still a good place, but the chess club would never regain the former glory for a long long time to come.

choir -
my greatest contribution was in quitting both times

guitar -
haha, 2 years was short, but sweet. i dunno how i got my post as ass SL, and dunno whether its valid, but i didnt do much except encourage a few juniors that still dun look as if they're going to improve. but the fellowship was great, and the music was good, so yeah sweet. maybe my greatest contribution was persuading kyeo, op and josh not to quit when there was that mass exodus.

frisbee -
was just pure fun. not even a proper cca, but maybe one of the longest lasting skills from sch that i would use and socialise for years to come.

2008-10-10T23:33:00.002+08:00

schools over

sad.

lets meet up again guys. been a blast

2008-10-05T22:11:00.001+08:00

is there HL 1 tmwr?

the all important qn that i need to know coz of some overdue homework that i have (un)conveniently forgot to do. dammit exam is comingggggg. time to get down to work...LOADS of work...........

hope i wun get scolded for EL tmwr

2008-10-05T00:12:00.002+08:00

been a long time

police talk - "do not blog about anything except your personal life. if u want to blog abt issues, do so in a positive light"

haha the good intentions behind that statement are appreciable, but it looks and sounds kinda amusing.

results day results day. it should be 35 not 38 man. just found a mistake in the math paper that would have pulled the result up to 7, the dratted EL teacher cancelled one criteria from 3 to 2, and coz of that i failed paper 1 and got 1 marks short of 6. dang. 1 mark short for bio too...from 5 to 6

i keep getting the eternal mark of 69 for bio. sec 4 i rmb asking william lai if i could do bio hl coz i got 69 for bio. he said nvm its 1 mark. last year i got 69 for bio. now i get 69 for bio! oh man this is frustating.

from what i hear, the singapore GP was a real organising disaster. the main race and the VIPs were done well, but the ground and the normal audiences were a real mess. guys, dun believe the papers, the fact is the grandstand was badly organised.

the amount of articles lauding the achievements of the GP was soooo many. once, twice or trice could suffice, but the overpouring of info and praise both realistic and unrealistic served to sicken the reader rather than make us proud. there was a statement that said "the race took a back seat and the skyline of singapore took centrestage" or something like that. puhleeze that is suchhhh an erraneous statement. if the race wasnt taking centre stage than all the shops at marina and citylink would have raked in a bonanza. but instead they have no business, because everyone is watching the race! why are people there, to watch the race and socialize, appreciate the night view since we're there. why do people tune in? to watch the race. im sure the image of kimi crashing is more engrained in their minds then the singapore night sky.

results results

2008-09-25T21:13:00.001+08:00

"i want to take my son out of school because he refuses to study more than 6 hrs a day during the 1 week BREAK that u gave him"

haha i want to hear that.

lalalala.

*insert f word here*

2008-09-19T23:38:00.002+08:00

kyo

tired but over.

its sad that existance of a students is defined by how long izzit to his/her next exam.

anyway, islamey rox

2008-09-16T21:42:00.000+08:00

i bombed

i bombed

i killed myself

something can only make u stronger if it doesnt kill you

2008-09-16T11:32:00.001+08:00

grade 8 and 5 exam in a few hours time

all the best to me

To GOD be the glory

2008-09-07T21:00:00.003+08:00

today's performance was kinda bad. didnt do as well as i could and as i should. well at least i managed to memorise fully one of my favourite pieces. hoo boy.
the standard wasnt as good as i expected it to be, only the japanese girl was good, the rest, including me, kinda bad. haiz and the exam is only 1 wk+ away.

no help that prelims start tmwr. i always go in with the feeling that this time would be the time that i can do well, and then always ends up in disaster or near disaster. so this time, i will go in expecting the worst. i've been recieving doomsday predictions all my time in IB, with the intensity increasing towards the end of the school life. but so far i have survived all of them. so we shall see.

all the best everyone. its almost the end.

2008-09-02T20:34:00.002+08:00

hols are no longer hols

"since its the hols, u shld be doing the housework"
and
"dun think that this is the hols, its just a period for extensive study and nothing else"
best is:
"u better and sit there and study till you die"

i love it.

some jumpy song is playing on the radio now. sounds interesting